Dear Chris and Kathy, two Christmases ago,
I didn’t realize the eggnog was of the “adult” variety when I gave your four year old a glass. We thought he was just acting silly, but then he puked up rum and nog vomit all over the couch, and I realized what I had done. Srsly sorry I never fessed up, but, at least he was really entertaining. Drunken children are always funny.