Dear roommates, from two years ago summer,
Sorry I was too drunk to realize that the girl I was hitting on was actually a hooker. I should’ve know by the slutty outfit, the fact that we met outside the bar on a street corner, and her readiness to get in a cab with me. Sorry I brought her home, let her go down on me, and then refused to pay her anything. Lastly, sorry she flipped out and broke the flat-screen on her way out the door.