- concerned neighbor
Dear little kids who live next door to me,
Srsly sorry, but I think the guy who lives on the other side of you is a pedophile. Srsly, he is the creepiest middle-aged dude I’ve ever seen. He’s never had one visitor, he wears a coon-skin hat in the middle of summer, and I’ve see him looking over your way before. Just saying, little kids, watch your little behinds!