- Osama Bin Laden
Now that I’m dead, I just wanted to get this apology out there. I am srsly sorry that I gave you all a bad name with my extremest views and teachings. So, yah, I preyed on the impoverished and feeble minded to build an army of religious fanatics who would die at my command, all following the radical version of jihad I created from which I had no formal education in whatsoever. Yeah, my bad. Now none of you can go outside, or wear traditional garb, or especially ride in an airplane, in the western world without receiving uneasy stares and general suspicions from everyone near you. I guess part of me never thought anyone would actually listen to what I had to say, after all, it was pretty crazy.