Dear Brad and Kelly,

Last New Years, when you two, me, and Jess shared the queen size bed in the hotel room (that’s right, 4 to a bed), Jess and I proceeded to hook up once you two fell asleep. ┬áSrsly sorry for having sex 6 inches away from you. I am almost positive we kept any and all fluids on our side, but who knows, it was dark…

- Kev

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