Jacob,

Last winter, I got super high and ate the cupcakes your girlfriend brought over.  I then woke up to find cupcake frosting all over the couch, which is also yours.  I then went into my room, passed out, and got up to leave for Christmas vacation.  To this day I deny any cupcake eating, or couch frosting had anything to do with me.  I am a sweet-toothed high selfish bastard, and I know it.  Srsly sorry.

- your old roomy

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