Dear Mary Jane,

I’m sorry beautiful, we really tried.  F&^%ing feds.  One day you’ll be free!

- the state of California

Dear random guy I got stoned with,

Totally sorry we all urged you to jump off the front porch, which resulted in an extreme face plant on the cold, hard ground.  We were worried when you didn’t move for several minutes.  Hope you were ok, because I went back inside.

- anonymous

Noel,

Sorry I’m such a crappy dealer and friend. I continually sell light bags to you, and this week I plan on giving you coke that’s really crushed up salt and sugar…. really though didn’t your mom tell you not to trust drug users????

- S.K.

Kids,

Now that you are young adults and semi-responsible, you should know, drugs are awesome.  When I was younger I experimented with almost everything.  LSD, coke, weed, etc.  Ecstasy is amazing.  Sorry for waiting so long to tell you this, but, if you haven’t already,  you should really do some experimenting.

- Mom of 22 years

Nikkie,
Sorry I had sex with you, then went upstairs and had sex with my little brothers friend, then went back and had sex with you again, then made you take us to my job at 3 in the morning so my “boyfriend” could make us food. Wow,  zannys are a crazy drug.  Sorry that I don’t remember half of it.

- Morgan

To the NM Crew,

I’m sorry I brought that hooker up to the room in Vegas and got all our shit stolen.  She wasn’t even even one of those hot vegas hookers.  I guess that’s what you get when all you have to offer is 15 bucks and a line of coke.

- Erich E

This is the first post ever for SRSLY SORRY!

- srsly sorry