Dear funkyb1tchwh0r3 ex-gf,

Kinda sorry I broke up and said it was because of your vag, but srsly, that sh*t smelled like a dirty senior diaper filled with curry flavored b-dubs wings dipped in an unwiped ass. Ick. Srsly, douche, do some sit-ups, get a face lift and nose job, and see a psychiatrist.

- Grossed Out Ex

Dear Layney,

Sorry about that time I started bleeding unannounced when you were on the treadmill at the gym. Also sorry you thought that cute guy was approaching you to meet you, and maybe ask you out, when he actually was just being nice and telling you about the blood spot welling up in your crotch.  Yeah, sorry about that.

- Your Vagina

Dear Olivia,

Your vagina looks like Gandolf’s sleeve.  Srsly Sorry.

- eric

Dear Kelly,

On our last vacation to the beach, we were exploring the cove and you decided to take a seat in the shallows. Well, turns out that little sea urchin was already sitting there.  Sorry that your gooch got impaled, and sorry that the ocean hates you.

- Your Hubby

Dear Mom,

Sorry that I destroyed your vagina when you gave birth to me.  Srsly sorry, I ravaged that thing.  Good thing you love me so much!

- Your new baby girl

Dear Vaginas,
Sorry you go and start bleeding every month. That must suck.

- Balls and Penis